I laughed so loud I think I woke the house. You are my kind of funny. Reminds me of a friend who I send articles and it just occurred to me she maybe schemes and never reads. So I recommended the player, with speed control. Look! aside from ingo overload I think very few people have moments of pure silence -not being interrupted to take in any form of information. I have to do my leisure reading in the AM or else late at night and then I am prone to go night night. Loves this.